Monday, September 13, 2010

It's My Party And I'll Cry If I Want To

I'm having a pity party today.

Come on in and join me, if you like.
It's raining inside my world-
and I look like crap-
and -who cares, really?

First off, I'm typing on
someone else's computer
because my faithful laptop
took a big flying monkey leap
off on some tangent that won't
load Windows properly.

Next, I slept on a stack of four pillows
last night in an attempt to rid myself
of the sour gastric bile that
was churning up into my throat
from the delicious gumbo
my daughter sent over.

Plus, I totally ruined my diet this weekend
with hefty portions of pepperoni pizza,
thick bread-y slabs of Jimmy John's subs,
and giant slices of carrot cake,
studded with crunchy walnuts
and lathered in several inches of
cream cheese frosting.

And then-
you know that whole world seems unfair
because I'm not going to have
a Halloween party this year.

I've had one for the past five years
and it is a wonderful outlet for my
creative energy.
I guess I'll just stew in all this unused
hostess juice and stagnate like
a moldy zombie.

Finally, I am thinking about quitting my blog.


Well, I told you it was a pity party!
We are feeling sorry for ourselves here!
Positive, secure, winning, successful people
might as well get the heck out
because we are slobbering losers here today
that are wallowing in self-pity
and self-deprevation.

I am considering closing down till
the first of the year.
Maybe by then, I'll be inspired again
and start all over with something new and fun-
(and a blog that will actually get people to leave comments).

Well, just spilled my coffee
and the dog wants out
and I have a slight hint of B.O.
from postponing my morning shower
for this disgraceful party of mine.

Okay, that's it.

You can go home now.