Friday, July 17, 2009

Wiener, Wiener, Wiener


Tomorrow is national Hot Dog Day
and I'll most likely be celebrating
with a mustard-slathered Oscar Meyer.

Or maybe two.

Well, three's my limit.

Really.

I think I like hot dogs so much
because they are so easy and versatile.
You can eat them all cold and wet
from the package-
or put them on a long stick and
burn them over a fire.

You can nuke them, grill them,
boil them, and crock pot them.
You can deep fry them in batter,
wrap them in a crescent roll,
and pair them with bbq beans.

How great is that?

So, you don't have to be Rachel Ray
to prepare hot dogs for your family.
And-
you don't have to be a mathematician
to realize there are usually ten dogs
to a package
and only eight buns.

But don't panic.
I'm here to help.

You must buy five 8-pack buns
and four ten-pack hot dogs
to break even.

Here's some more trivia for
you wiener lovers:

450 hot dogs are eaten every second
of every day of every year,
on average about 65 per person
in the United States annually.

95 percent of homes serve hot dogs.

Most dogs are eaten at home,
15 percent purchased from street vendors.
9 percent bought at ball parks.

Mustard remains the hottest topping,
used regularly by 87.6 percent of the eaters.

The top dog for most folks is the 6-incher,
preferred by 48.3 percent of us:
26 percent like a 7-incher:
4 percent, the foot long.

The only food-shaped vehicle
that I know of is the
Wienermobile.

Created in 1936 to promote
Oscar Meyer products,
they started a contest where the winners
get to ride in the hot dog shaped car.

And they hand out wiener whistles to the crowds.
How cool is that?

I used to like my cold hot dogs
dipped in vinegar and salt.
I think that was a glitch in
the Crawford gene pool,
but- hey- they are pretty good.
Try it sometime.

But, no matter what brand
or style you choose,
or how you cook them,
celebrate National Hot Dog Day
with a mouth full of fun.

The weather is going to be perfect.
The grill is going to be hot.
My mouth is already watering.

The only thing that would make
the day any better is-
if I could just get my hands
on one of those wiener whistles!