When you want to buy your favorite person
a special Easter gift-
and can't afford the gourmet chocolates,
expensive stuffed toys,
or a variety of DVD's and books,
it's time to seek out some Peeps.
Beautifully colored,
but dirt cheap,
these sugary marshmallow treats
grace the shelves of every store in town.
Chick shaped, bunny shaped,
and even the new tulip shaped
always seem to bring a smile
to the recipients face.
Yeah.
Fun to look at.
Weird to eat.
To me they are like
biting into a crunchy Nerf ball.
But being so pretty and so cheap
got me to thinking that surely
there are other uses for these
little sweet animals
besides edible consumption.
Here are a few ideas:
Peeps are great substitutions
for badminton birdies.
Light-weight and versatile,
these marshmallow treats
light up the net area like rainbows
in flight.
Once their eyes begin to be
annihilated by the racket, however,
it's time to replace them with a fresh Peep.
Peeps make great packing material for
those fragile articles that you must ship.
Not only do they make a fantastic artistic
display in place of bubble wrap,
they will not harm the environment, either.
Thread a few Peeps on a string
and they instantly become
a retro-style necklace,
an Easter tree ornament,
or a innovative cat toy.
Peeps make a great antenna topper for your car.
So much classier than a Jack in The Box head,
more colorful than a Nascar miniature,
and more durable than a stupid smiley face.
I found out that they make great
art projects by gluing and pasting them
to old picture frames,
wooden boxes
and tin cans.
Just a thick coat of polyurethane
will protect your Peep masterpieces
from rodents and insects.
With a little extra TLC,
they will last forever.
Peeps can be the poor person's
action-figure doll.
Miniature clothing and a few select props,
and you've got a day's worth of fun!
So, you won't find me eating my Peeps.
Instead, I'm dreaming of new ways
to introduce them to society.
You'll find us...
just chillin'.
