Monday, August 3, 2009

Kind of Semi-Homemade

When it comes to kitchen duty,
I'm usually pretty good
at keeping the sink clear of dishes
and the salt and pepper shakers filled.

But as I've mentioned before,
my culinary skills do lack
I like to think of myself
as a eccentric Sandra Lee-
creating a hodge-podge of
semi- homemade treats
that no one would ever guess
aren't from scratch.

I mean, who really bakes a
cake from scratch anymore?
I figure by the time you buy
your ingredients for a single cake,
you could have purchased
at least ten boxes of
Betty Crocker cake mix.

I honestly owe my life to
those many boxes in my cupboard
with the big red spoon on them.
They've been a life saver
when cookies had to be baked
for a school event,
company was coming suddenly,
or that sweet tooth flared up at midnight
and I couldn't possibly drive
all the way to Dunkin'Donuts.

I think us gals tend to forget
how easy General Mills
has made our lives.

But just who is Betty Crocker?

Well, according to history,
Betty didn't really exist.
It was simply a name made up
by the flour producer
to answer baking questions
posed by women back in 1921.
They thought it would give
the response a more personalized tone.

So they combined the name "Crocker"
from a company director-
and "Betty" because it was
considered cherry and friendly.
Thus, Betty Crocker was born. up, rather.

Eventually, an artist stepped in
and created a vision of what
they thought women might
imagine her looking like.

Then advertisers did
their magic.

After all these years,
Betty is still invited to our kitchens
without a single thought.

You can't say the same for
Wolfgang Puck,
Rachael Ray, or Paula Deen.
To me, their kind of cooking
is too detailed and laborious.

But with Betty,
if you've got eggs and oil-
you've got a party!

And the greatest thing about it
is that when my husband asks
who helped me
bake that delicious
German Chocolate cake-
I don't have to lie to him.

Since, in theory, Betty Crocker
didn't really exist-
I can say without a smidgen of guilt-

Would you like to lick the spoon?"