I’m going on a vacation in a few weeks, so I’ve torn up my closets trying to find and organize my luggage.
Somehow I’ve procured several mismatched sets and carry-on’s - and even a few with broken handles, missing wheels and hotel soap still tucked into the netting.
Wow…I’ve sure come a long way since the paper sacks my husband and I stuffed our clothes into on our very first vacation.
I will probably do a lot of walking on this trip and have considered what type of purse to carry that will be comfortable as well as roomy.
And I almost choke every time I realize that my best choice by far is the F-Pack.
No offense to those of you who regularly use a Fanny Pack, but somehow I’ve always placed the F-Pack in the same league as chain wallets, acid washed jeans tucked into slouch socks, and mullets.
It’s a shameful discrimination that I find myself abandoning –because suddenly I see the advantages of a super, all-in-one bag that requires no hands or shoulders to carry.
In an attempt to familiarize myself with this much misunderstood fashion accessory, I studied Wikipedia this morning.
Wikipedia says this:
belt pack (US),
belly bag (US),
Buffalo pouch (US),
hip sack (US),
hip pack (UK),
or bum bag (UK, Oceania),
moon bag (South Africa),
the Joe bag,
or man bag,
is a small fabric pouch secured with a zipper and worn at the waist by a strap around the hips or waist.
The name "fanny pack" is derived from the fact that they were traditionally worn facing the rear above the buttocks, for which fanny is a slang term in America.
Despite the name, many do not wear fanny packs on their rear because they are easier to pick pocket and harder to access. In English-speaking Canada, due to proximity to the United States, "fanny pack" is the more commonly used term as well.
In the United Kingdom and Anglophone Oceania, the term "bum bag" or "belt bag" is used, since the word "fanny" means vagina, rather than buttocks, in those countries.
I just really don’t think my husband is going to let me run all over creation with a “vagina bag” fanny pack locked around my waist.
Can’t you just hear the conversation on the beach?
“Hey, hon, could you reach into your vagina bag fanny pack and find me some crackers?”
“Your vagina bag fanny pack looks a little puffy today.What have you got in it?”
Stranger in the restaurant: “Wow! I love that vagina bag fanny pack. I’ve never seen one like it before!”
Crap. An F-Pack is now totally out of the question. Thanks, Wikipedia!
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March 13 is International Fanny Pack Day.
Wear yours proudly!!!!
