Monday, February 16, 2009

Magazine Malfunctions

I subscribe to a lot of magazines
and each one I find a bit of inspiration
or a new discovery.

I seem to gravitate toward the country publications-
those that endorse flea market decorating
or suggest a picnic lunch to enjoy
on a fishing trip
to the back yard pond.

That's how I like my magazines.

That's how I like my life.

So, that is why I've made the decision
to do away with a few magazines
that I have habitually renewed every year
without a second thought.
Magazines that are stuffed with
beautiful glossy photos,
unique art, fabulous furniture
and exquisite food.

I'm seeing more and more
and overblown designs.
Expensive ideas
and ridiculous choices.

For instance, the latest issue of
one magazine asked top designers
a very simple question:
"What is your favorite place to spend the day and what activity do you enjoy there?"

Here's the type of response it triggered:

"I enjoy a jog on the beach, my Gucci bag in tow- where later, by sunset, I'll sip Chteau Marguax wine and have some Brie cheese with those little crackers from the south of France."

"Most certainly it has to be the magnificent villa in Santa Cristina, Spain with it's cornflower blue walls, full amenities and private dining. I vacation here bi-annually and scour the countryside for fine antiques and gilded goodies for future clients."


"The Promenade de Carfe where my husband and I discovered these perfect alabaster columns and had them incorporated into our new home. Shipping them to the states was absolutely outrageous, but we love them. I still can't believe they are really ours."

Okay. Enough.
Are these people serious?
Are they crazy or something?
What kind of fairy tale world
do they live in?

Maybe I'm getting old.
Maybe it's a bit senility or
that old-lady-grouchiness that
seems to come in bitter waves-
aimed at the younger and richer.
But- those kind of people just
make me want to vomit.

And then, maybe I've always been this way.
Only wanting simple things.
Comfortable places.
Warm experiences.

Ask me.

Well, my favorite place is the corner of the couch.
Here I can raise the blinds and watch the deer
stroll across the field. I can open the window
and feel the sun and smell the breeze. I can read
a book here, watch TV, or do nothing at all.
I can sit in my corner of the couch and sip hot coffee,
gorge myself on salty chips, or listen to my husband
play guitar.

There's nothing phony or plastic or presumptuous
about that.

Today I sit here in the corner of the couch
and sort through magazines
that I no longer want.
It's time to simplify.
Get down to basics.

Because that's how I like my life.